What’s up with this?

A poor grasp of ghost biology

So there’s this movie coming out called The Unborn in which a woman is haunted by the ghost of the twin brother she didn’t know she had because he died in the womb. In the trailer, she is followed by this little boy ghost who is like 6-8 years old. This is not how ghosts work. She should be followed around by a fetus-aged ghost. I would even accept a ghost the same age as she is because he is her twin. But it’s not like ghosts age at a slower rate than the living. He should either not age or age at the same rate as the rest of us. I call bullshit on this movie.

I do not intend to see this movie; but if you see it, and they address this issue, please let me know.

A Damn Shame

Heath Ledger’s performance as The Joker will never be topped. He is what you read in the comics. The good ones. That terrifying villain that can’t be predicted. The perfect balance to The Batman. He’s what you see in Arkham Asylum: A Serious House on Serious Earth, The Killing Joke, and so many others. He’s the guy I first remember meeting when I got into comics, showing up in the shop, thinking I knew The Batman and The Joker. I had been mostly reading Green Lantern, but on a whim I picked up an issue of the Bat-family sweeping story-arc, No Man’s Land, and I got hooked on the bat. So I gathered up as many issues as I could. And I met The Joker. And I was terrified. Vicious, with a sense of humor only he can fully appreciate. And that’s what I saw last Saturday at 7:15 down at the Seekonk Showcase. I had been sad when I learned of Ledger’s death, sad for his family, and sad for the loss of what I had thought to be a pretty good actor. Then I saw this, and I’m sad on a whole new level. The sadness of a young kid in a comic shop who got there a little too late, and all the copies of the latest issue have already been sold.

It’s been a long time coming…

I’m finally getting around to commenting on Juno, the recent “indie” sensation. First, let me make it known that I thought it was very well-acted. My main beef is with the dialogue. No one talks like that and it was straight up embarrassing to listen to because of how awful it was. For example, “Oh, sorry, abortion clinic, I can’t hear you, since I’m such a quirky youth, I am speaking with you on a phone that…LOOKS LIKE A HAMBURGER!!! EVERYONE LOOK AT MY PHONE!!” Pointing it out is insulting and pathetic, like a hammy child at a grown up party, someone with a “More Cowbell” t-shirt, or a hipster’s moustache.

As a side note, Ellen Page, has compared her character to a modern-day Holden Caulfield. Where the hell do you get off, you smug flavor of the week?

(Michael Cera, keep doing what you do. You only do the one thing, but you do a damn fine job.)

So you know what’s gross?

                 

This horrible muddy boot face on the big screen. Now, don’t start calling me a hater. Hocus Pocus is truly and sincerely a masterpiece. This movie though, sounds quite unpleasant. Nothing like 90 minutes of four awful women having cake and then complaining that they can’t eat it, too, inane chit chat about the cake, “funny” and/or “insightful” narration about what the cake represents, and a big ol’ terrible Sarah Jessica Parker face. No thanks.